Do you remember the famous Norman Rockwell painting of Thanksgiving that originally graced the cover of the Post magazine many years ago? In this famous painting a family is sitting around a table loaded with food and an older lady, probably the grandmother, is holding the turkey for all to see. As nostalgic and iconic as the picture may be, I don’t think this is what most people experience on Thanksgiving. What about you?
This fact was driven home to me during the table topic portion at my Toastmaster’s group this week. The lady leading the table topic asked, “Have you ever had an irregular Thanksgiving?” As it turned out, it seemed like everyone had had some kind of unusual event. The descriptions of these gatherings ranged from turkeys falling into a soapy sink, turkeys flying across the room and landing in a guest’s lap, being served a Chinese dinner instead of turkey and trimmings, and a lady showing up unannounced at an ex-spouse's house for Thanksgiving dinner.
This last one was interesting because the ex-husband had shown up at the ex-wife's house uninvited over the years, with his current girlfriend-of-the-month in tow. Then one year the ex-wife told the family (which included his children, their spouses, and the grandchildren), "We are going to Dad’s house this year." Sure enough, they all showed up, unannounced on the doorstep of his house, which he shared with his current girlfriend. The ex-wife said it was her best Thanksgiving ever because this time she surprised the ex-husband, and she did exactly what the ex-husband always did; she went into the living room and plopped down in a chair and allowed him to serve her.
Have you ever experienced an irregular Thanksgiving? I don’t think any of us truly have had the Thanksgiving that Norman Rockwell portrayed in his famous Post cover. Maybe I’m wrong, but I think more of us have experienced at least a few of the irregular kind. From my own experience, we know the meal is ready with the smoke alarm goes off. The details are very sensitive…but that’s the story and we are sticking to it. It seems the irregularities are what people remember most, and perhaps they at least make the day more memorable.
The examples I’ve given are amusing ones, but there are some for whom, disappointment is on the menu every time their family gets together. Could it be because we feel we are under pressure to live up to the Norman Rockwell ideal? That perfect Thanksgiving is what other people have, not us. But not so fast! Could it be that a change in attitude and a few altered expectations might turn around the outcome?
This Thanksgiving can be different if we adjust our expectations and realize that the purpose of the holiday is the opportunity to spend time together, to be with family and friends that you might not have a chance to see often. Find the joy in being together with whatever group you find yourself with this year. Yes, there may be mishaps. There may even be real problems! The food might not taste exactly as you remember it or not be to your personal liking. But instead of focusing on these inconveniences, consider what Thanksgiving is really about! Think of all that you have to be thankful for this year. I’m certain there are more things than you imagine. Start by making a list. Here are a few things to consider!
• You're alive
• You have a group to spend Thanksgiving with, even if it’s a only a pair of family members, a few or friends, or you're serving dinner at a homeless shelter!
• ________________________
What can you add to your list? What will you be thankful for this "irregular" Thanksgiving?
